Wednesday, April 18, 2007
HANNAH AND HER SISTERS
TO: HIT A U-TURN, DROPPING HER BACK HOME
FROM: THE SPORTSWRITER
RE: THE GREAT SUBURBAN SHOWDOWN IN THE SKY
KIMORA: So, look, it was what it was. And because of that I'm willing to let it off the leash a little.
TYRA: Take it for a walk, Bitch!
KIMORA: Right!? But don't tell me that shit isn't self-indulgent. If I want to watch an hour of new-money, mid-life suburban malaise...I'LL TURN MY FUCKING SECURITY CAMERA ON! Okay!? Staring at a lake? It's called Independence Day! I read that shit in hardcover. Watching a bunch of peolple play Monopoly?! I'm busy! Child-labor scandals, marriage shit the bed, Djimon Hounsou keeping me pigeon-toed.
TYRA: The. Collected. Stories. Of. John. Cheever.
KIMORA: POST-WAR AMERICAN LIT. Hit the Learning Annex!
BEYONCE: I thought it was...fluid.
KIMORA: You read that on a blog!? Look, these things end...
TYRA: Life, love, art...
KIMORA: That's what I'm saying! Who doesn't run out of things to say!? I mean, look at rap; how long can you do that shit for before you become irrel-
TYRA: [LOUD COUGHING] Is it just my anti-psychotics talking, or is Eddy Curry LOOKING. GOOD.
KIMORA: What did I tell you about dating post-players.
BEYONCE: How you doing, Baby?
TYRA: Jay, you having a good time, Honey?
KIMORA: Is somebody a little borrrred?
JAY: Heh [SIGH]...Actually, you know, I'm gonna bounce...
TYRA: Uh-oh! Somebody's a cranky pants!
JAY: Yeahhhhno. Um, nah...just...I just got this text from Fab, he...um, needs me for something in the studio...
KIMORA: Who's that again?
TYRA: Oh, bitch don't even play: "I'm tryna get in and out of your room/ Just to get/ IN AND OUT OF YOUR WOMB" [hi-five]
BEYONCE: Baby, I thought you said you were shunning him?
JAY: Well, it's not really him...I mean, it's his session, but Just needs me to re-wire someth....He needs me to check something in his shared drive for Pro Too...I gotta go.
BEYONCE: I'm gonna see you later, right?
JAY: [exhale] A...ffirmative.
[JAY stares at Steve Francis for a moment]
BEYONCE: I need more organic honey.
JAY: I'll tell Bleek. Ladies...
TYRA & KIMORA: Auf Wiedersehen/Ciao....